Your lottery ball is in my yard now.

People continually ask me how is it I attract so many scammers. I don’t believe they are targeting me differently than their computer programs seek out any other account. Similar to the random number generators that dial spam phone calls. Unlike most people, I am willing to engage with anyone who contacts me. To me,…

Gone Fish’n: (Part V) Hook, Line, and Muscatine.

Truth is stranger than fiction. Strangest thing to come out of my conversation with Christine Debbie is truth emerging from our fiction. I could have never predicted the turn of events on the closing day of scammer scramble. Money for nothing, get your chicks for free! For those in the audience who are new to scammers, this…

Gone Fish’n: (Part IV) Cult of Personality Disorder

“I’ve been involved in a number of cults both as a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower but you make more money as a leader.”  — Creed Bratton I continue to question our scammer’s grasp of reality. The more absurd the messenger feed travels, the greater my concern for the…

Gone Fish’n: (Part III) I am Batman?

Should I wear the spandex? Possibly the codpiece with  blue spandex? What about eyeliner and latex boots? Am I Batman, or a male dominatrix? This journey is taking me into uncharted waters of fiction. There could be a future lawsuit from DC Comics, levying allegations of gross misrepresentation of the Dark Knight. I am not…

Gone Fish’n: (Part I) Hamster Lies Matter

The digital void between reality and fiction is over populated with scam artist hustling to con people into believing that help, love, and riches have arrived. Occasionally the ill-repute cast a line into my space hoping for a bite. This time the bait goes by Christine Debbie, a 30 year old gal looking for love…

Trail We Going: (Part II) Hearken the striped-back jester.

With Jim Beam floating down the mountain, Brook pondered our route; forge up the rapids of Ashdown Gorge, or retreat to Plan B, C, D, or possibly E. He is a man with many trail hikes under his pack, and there are plenty well-worn paths to our final destination. While Brook calmly re-calibrates our trip,…

Trail We Going: (Part I) Tragedy on the banks of Rattlesnake Creek

“This looks like a good place to cross.” Brook, our trail guide and bachelor extraordinary, planned the weekend’s bachelor party. He used 50-year-old US Forest maps that had been digitized. The satellite images Brook downloaded to plot the course were from the most recent winter months. The areal pictures showed a dry creek bed with…

You leave mama outta this! Part Two

“The secret of being a top-notch con man is being able to know what the mark wants, and how to make him think he’s getting it.”  — Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest I once heard repetition is a key to comedy. Now it can be said repetition is a key to internet scams and getting…

You leave mama outta this!

“Let his greed meet his imagination.”  —  Matchstick MenMy father taught me a honest person will never be conned because the honest person is never looking for an easy free.  So when a foreign hacker stepped into this honest man’s digital house pretending to be my mother he got taken on a little journey through the weird. If you gonna dress-up…